(Ta-Daa!) Ladies and Gentlemen, I have come to the conclusion that I absolutely hate telephones.
Wired. Cellular. Cordless. Whatever.
It wasn't always this way. There was a time when I enjoyed (or at least could tolerate) talking to someone on the phone. I'm not really sure what led up to my incredible dislike of the phone. I think that it was a culmination of factors.
- Racing to the phone, oftentimes hurting myself or making attempts at removing smaller appendages on my body only to miss the call or find that it was some assinine telemarketer or worse yet--a prerecorded message of some kind.
- Being engrossed in a project and having the phone suddenly start ringing.
- Prerecorded telemarketing. As if telemarketers weren't bad enough, some moron dreamed up the idea of just letting a computer dial phone numbers and then play a recorded message over the line. Soon as I figure it out, I hang up on these. What I really hate is when these calls get my answering machine and fill it up.
- Junk Faxing
- Calls at inopportune times.
- Cell Phones (especially after the transition to digital phones, which modulate every background noise and make it sound like intrusive mumbling or the bubbling of a fish tank...)
- People driving while talking on cell phones. (Nothing you have to say is that important. Pull over. Do everyone sharing the road with you a BIG favor.)
When I get out on my own and live in my own dwelling, I am very seriously considering NOT having a telephone of any kind. I realize that it could be handy, or downright essential in the event of an emergency, but I think the annoyance of a phone outweights any benefit it has. If for some reason I would have a phone, it will be set up in a number of ways. Should it be a landline phone, I will have an unlisted number and will not answer it unless I am good and feeling like it. If it's a cell phone, it will only be turned on when I want to hear from it.
I realize that a lot of this might sound awfully hard nosed, or downright rude, but take a moment and think about it. Telephones are pretty darned intrusive things.